I’m Not Afraid of Lent
It’s Lent. Generally speaking I love this season of the church year. I love the slowing down, the somber tone, the minor keys, the intention of surrender and sacrifice. Acknowledgement of limitations. Namely death.
But this year I don’t need the reminder. It’s been dark out there for way too long. Over the last few months my community of friends, church, and neighbors has been hit with death, heart attacks, suicides, job loss and depression. There are days when the newspaper brings me to tears. I get darkness. I get death. I can’t bear it.
Typically during Lent folks give stuff up. Or take stuff on. Or dwell on which is better and lift their worries up to the heartless cloud of know it alls we know as facebook where they are set straight. And further tizzied.
As for myself, I came up with three ideas of what to give up this lent.
1. Lent. Nah. That would be the easy way out and what sort of stubborn church snob would I be if I didn’t do it the hard way?
2. Self. Nope. I love me. And this one gets too confusing. Too out there.
3. Fear. Yes. I’m giving up fear. Which scares the hell out of me. But that’s the kind of the point, correct?
I’m going with Jacqueline Bussie‘s take on life that the opposite of Hope is not Despair but rather Fear.
To be honest I don’t know what it looks like. Probably doing some new things. Earlier this week I faced my fear of the backstroke during lap swimming. I got water up my nose. I’ve said no to a few things this week. That’s something I’m generally afraid to do. Maybe that’s all it is. I’m guessing there’s more to it. I think living as someone who is not afraid could get a little crazy. But crazy is not all bad. Even Seal acknowledges this.
So good-bye fear, hello hope.
You so crazy.