attempted vehicular nate-slaughter

or –  I’m Sorry I Flipped You Off, But You Almost Took My Life

Dear Driver of a Red Saturn Vue who illegally passed me on Edgecumbe last night,

Last night when I had the right of way going down Edgecumbe past all the parked cars with my safety light flashing, you thought it was a good idea to pass me.  There was not room for you.  If I can reach out and slap your car you know you’re too close for comfort.  Especially my comfort.  And than you swerved in front of me and made a right hand turn causing me to brake and swerve.  You are a horrible driver.  That’s why I rang my little bell and flipped you off.  Sorry about that.  Not really.

 Dear Driver of a Red mid 90’s Jeep Cherokee exiting off south bound 35-E onto eastbound W. 7th this morning,

This morning I was running down the sidewalk along W. Seventh with a very visible white T-Shirt.  As I entered the intersection where you were making a right hand turn we made eye contact.  I was the guy with green light and the walk signal.  Remember that?  And then, 1/3 of the way through the intersection you gave me a little nod and made a right on red.  Remember that?  Remember how you and your impatient mass of metal took off right in front of the pedestrian in the cross walk?  Remember how I took off sprinting after you trying to catch your sorry ass at the next light? Did you see me?  Oh yes you did.  I’m sure of it because when I got within 20 feet of your SUV at the next intersection you went ahead and ran the red light to get away from me.  Wuss.  What did you think I was going to do?  Jump on your hood?  Well, in your defense, that’s exactly what I was planning.  Anyways, that’s why I flipped you off.  Sorry about that.  Not in the least.  But if it makes you feel like any less of an incompetent sack of poo, I did run a negative split thanks to the adrenaline rush of almost being hit by almost hitting the car back.

Posted: September 15th, 2008
Categories: bike, health, transportation
Comments: No Comments.

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